Here are the symptoms of Stuckedness:
- Fatigue. A lot of napping. Or dreaming of napping. Drapping, if you will.
- Walking aimlessly from room to room.
- Clicking aimlessly from project to project.
- IG. Tiktok. Facebook for the old folks. Repeat.
- Doomscrolling on Twitter (JUST DON’T DO IT. IT NEVER WORKS OUT.)
- Feelings of inadequacy paired with constant self-absorption. Tricky.
- Masking. Super cheery, “I’m GREAT! How are YOU?” hellos to everyone. This is exhausting.
- Emotional eating. Or maybe that was just me?
- Persistent thoughts like, “Isn’t there more to life than this?” and “It’s never gonna change.”
- Distraction. Constant, annoying, loud, baffling distraction.
Stuckedness sounds an awful lot like depression, doesn’t it?
Stuckedness can affect your work, your relationships, your own mental health. It can tell you that you’re the worst mom, co-worker, friend, artist, *fill in the blank* ever. It is very good at what it does, because it tells you to NOT move and then it makes not moving very, very comfortable.
Feeling stuck sucks.
Remember that 80’s movie The Never Ending Story? Ok, don’t worry, I’m not going to show you ANY images of Artax, because if you know, you know. You simply cannot bear to look at poor Artax drowning in the Swamp of Sadness, and I can’t afford to put you into therapy, so we’re just gonna gently remember… But also know that ARTAX COMES BACK AT THE END.
If you have dealt with Stuckedness, you really understand Artax. So, my analogy stands, but let’s move on before you get any more trauma. (He comes BACK, ok? Remember that!!)
That’s Stuckedness. It surrounds and drowns and wants you to give up. And any sort of movement just seems so hard. I’d rather just wrap up in a blanket and watch Nailed It on Netflix for four years, thank you.
And I just about did. I mean, two years ago I settled IN to the Stuckedness, ya’ll. My couch had a permanent outline of me and my dog in it. Any spare moment alone? I was stuck. Usually with a bag of chips so you know. Carbs.
Why am I telling you all this? Because I want you to understand that this *waves hands around* whole website/newsletter thing is not another hustle. It’s not going to sell you stuff. I don’t foresee a baseball hat with “Stuckedness” on it in the future. Down the road, there might be workshops, or classes, because that’s what I do anyhow (I’m still a teacher. I have been for over twenty years. Currently I teach writing at the local college).
I have been there, and I got out, and I want to help.
Also, all this stuff about sharing my story? It’s purely selfish. This keeps me sober and it makes my heart happy, so really, it’s all about me. Ask my husband. Nothing lines up with my brand more than, “Really, it’s all about me.” Perhaps I should stick THAT on a t-shirt and sell it.
So, here’s one practical giveaway to fight the Stuck:
Music. I went over to the youtubes, and I searched “Waves, music, focus, happy” and about fourteen kajillion options came up. I clicked the first one. Also, I searched: “Birdsong” and another majillion options tweeted at me. So, between the beach and the birdies, I felt like my soul had a soundtrack. I can tell you all about binaural beats and the “happiness frequency” but I just started with birdies. I didn’t want lyrics or music that is current – even my beloved ELO was out. This stuff was simple, serene, and very very easy to work to without distraction. And it helped. Try it! Here’s one of my favorites:
Carry on, friends. And eat dessert first.